I had to apologise to Lynden today - my more tricky middle, Aspergerish child. On Monday, when it was hot, I had parked quite far from the school and he had to walk a block with no shoes on. He moaned and groaned and moaned and groaned and nothing I said could stop the whining.
I had promised an ice cream or ice bite, but when I got home I said " that's it - No Ice creams for kids who moan and complain so much". While I said that I noticed that I was really mean and that I felt pure revenge. He was really mad.
Today I apologised to him - told him that I was wrong not to buy him an ice cream without warning him first that that would be a consequence. He appreciated the apology, and I got a hug tonight - quite a rare occurrence.
The course has been so good for us. I'm glad we have done it together as our different parenting styles were a real source of conflict in our marriage and neither of us really knew how to right it. I've still got a long way to go, but the mood in the house has changed and there is a whole lot less frustration and aggression all round. I didn't think that would be possible.