The social skill of taking turns is one that takes time, patience and many long faces to develop. On this day, we had our play-dough table nestled up against the wall and only two seats for the children to sit at.
After about ½ an hour, some children came up to me complaining that they wanted a turn at the table. I asked them if they had spoken to the other two at the table and they said that they had. I thought that it was that time again to start developing sharing skills.
“Okay guys, we have two children playing dough and another two who would like to play. What shall we do?”
Both parties voiced that they each wanted to play. We were heading towards a system of time allocation when another child (5yrs old) who was standing nearby piped up and said.
“I have a good idea. Why don’t they move the table away from the wall and put another two chairs on the other side, then all four children can sit at the table?”
My mouth hung open for a while till I said, “That sounds like a good idea. What do you all think?” The children agreed and they organised themselves.
As I was walking away from the table I mentioned to the idea-giver, “Ashwyn, that was a good idea. You thought a lot about how they could solve their problem. Now they can all play together.”
He responded, “I know, I have lots of good ideas. And I have lots more at home.”
In my pre-school class I constantly get children coming to ask me to do things for them. I have found the skill of respecting their struggle really helpful and it seems to give them courage to continue finding an alternate way. Take for example….
Megan: “Robin, I can’t make this heart.”
Robin: “Mmm, it can be quite tricky cutting out along those lines. It looks like those lines are really small. Maybe we can make a plan. What can we do to make those lines easier to see?”
Megan: “Maybe we can draw them again, with a big crayon.”
After having completed the heart and having regained self-confidence and pride, Ryan comes to complain about the same problem.
Robin: “It looks like these hearts are difficult to cut out. Megan came up with a good plan. Perhaps you can ask her to show you her plan.”
With that Ryan asks Megan for her idea and Megan beams with pride as she shows Ryan her idea and how it worked. Through this situation Megan has learnt that she has good ideas and that the children can help each other in solving problems. As the teacher I shifted the responsibility back to the children and they grow from the experience.
- every wondered what a difference you may be making for your child?
- have you ever seen how something so small can have such a large impact somewhere else?
- what would you do if you were this boy.... would you make a difference?
This story has been around the block many times and seems to be a huge driver for teachers. Often teachers wonder what impact they are having, and at times find it difficult to spend so much time on one child when our whole education system is in crisis.
Sometimes we can't predict what the outcomes of our actions are going to be, so we just take it a step at a time.
- You would do practically anything for your children, right?
- Your love for them literally has no boundaries?
- You wish to give your child everything they need?
Although this is one parent's amazing story, I reckon you would do the same as well.
Although this seems like an extra-ordinary story, I still feel that this happens every day in many ways, through out the world.
This is a tribute to you as a parent, where ever you are, and what ever you do for your children.
Please share your insights, your inspirations or comments below:
- Have we let our youth down?
- Are our parenting styles creating incompetent youths?
- Is there hope for you youths in a world that is fast deteriorating?
This clever video clip takes a look at some of these questions and shows how our values may still be ok
A teacher gets a wake up call when she has pre-judged a child to be naughty.
Teachers need to be more open to seeing the world from a child's perspective. Schooling is not just about reading and writting but also about friendships, care, love, and happiness.
- How do you know if you are overprotecting your children?
- How much risk is a good thing?
- Can risking something turn into a good thing?
A great quote says, "many a one has succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had never met defeat, he would never have known any great victory.'
Every time we try to protect our children from possible failure or rejection, we simultaneously deny them the possibility of succeeding, of persevering, and of accomplishing their dreams.
We nearly always regret what we don't do, and are grateful for the learning from what we do.
This incredibly powerful advert really conveys that people often don't see themselves as they really are. And inspite of our attempts to persuade them otherwise, they don't believe us.
In the world of our children, we often praise them for things we see them do, wanting to boost their confidence and self esteem, but they often don't really believe that about themselves. This is the similarity to this video clip shown here. It is essential we learn the intelligent skills of praise that will support our children in seeing themselves as they truely are.
Eventhough this clip is about autism, I believe it stands true for every child. We must be aware of what we are judging and how we are labeling our children. When we come from a space of wanting to understand, then maybe then we can really support our children in becoming the beings they wish to become.
This is a fascinating and humerous look at how some discpline scenarios have changed, for better or for worse. Are our modern parenting styles and techniques going to back fire on us as predicted here?
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